A Smooth Criminal, and: Batman's Greatest Writer

Holy frikkin' crap, longest day ever.

Okay, normally I get on here and complain about working ticketbox, and usually, sure, it's annoying, but I get through. But not since my first disasterous day as ticketbox head have I had such a purely awful, strenuously conflict-riddled ordeal out at the front of the NBC guest relations office. First, the less annoying part, which, still, is unbelievably annoying. Everyone had an issue today. Every single person coming in had some sob story or some reason why they'd keel over and die if they did not get on the 12 pm tour. I heard about people driving 2000 miles, 3000 miles, appparently everyone is in the habit of driving straight across the country just to get on the freekin' 11:30 NBC Studio Tour, never, not for a moment, anticipating that it is FIRST COME, FIRST SERVE. PEOPLE! Realize that you have to be a little bit flexible, this isn't the German train system or something, it's not an exact science. But yeah, that, THAT, was only the tip of the iceberg.

Hmm, should I or shouldn't I go into details? Tempting, but I guess if the situation were reversed I wouldn't want some jackass going on the internet and detailing my particular failings of character. But basically, things got badly screwed up with the scheduling today, and it wasn't due to the customers, but because of my fellow pages acting like immature jerks and nobody stepping up to the plate and saying "yeah, things aren't going exactly as I planned in my ideal vision of what this day would be like (aka sitting on my ass doing nothing), but don't worry I'll help out." Some people need to get their heads out of their asses and learn to work as PROFESSIONALS, which sometimes means 1.) taking one for the team, and 2.) COMMUNICATING with others in a productive, not destructive manner.

ANYWAYS ...

A few small highlights did brighten up my otherwise rough day. One was, guess who was on the guest list for the Tonight Show today, who checked in on the guest list with her family? Jenna Fischer, the leading lady from the US version of The Office! Cool! I am a big fan of the actress, and I even got to talk to her for a bit and tell her how I thought she did a great job on the show, and how I was glad it got renewed. And she had not a hint of snobbishness or anything - a truly class act and nice person. So that was pretty cool.

Also, randomly, my former landlord from my early LA days at the Burbank Extended Stay Inn was on the guest list. Weird.

OH YEAH ...

So everyone at work was preoccupied with the stupid Michael Jackson trial today, as I suppose much of the country was. Now to quote a great man: I'm not the kind of guy to say I told you so, but I told you so. It was so clear to me that MJ was going to gt off scott free in this case. It's what happens when the accuser in a trial is most likely just as corrupt and whacked out as the accused. I mean what parent, in their right mind, let's a kid stay at Neverland Ranch in the wake of the charges that had previously been leveled against Jackson? Clearly, these are people who wanted something and would do ANYTHING to get it. There was little solid evidence, from what I know, in this case. Just circumstantial testimony and a scattered bunch of reports about Jackson's behavior, few of which directly relate to the particular incident in question, and most of which could not be supported by multiple witnesses or any concrete evidence. So no, in this particular case, there was NO WAY they were going to find him guilty of anything. As for MJ, I think that basically he is just a really screwed up guy who while he may even sometimes be well intentioned in trying to help kids, he just is clueless in terms of what is appropriate in terms of how to act with kids and how not to act. No question, he is a guy who has done some highly questionable, sketchy stuff, and who needs someone to forcefully take him aside and tell him "look, you need help, and you need to change some of your attitudes. Even if you don't like it, you have got to realize what is and is not appropriate." So yeah, a predictable if unsatisfactory resolution - which as could be anticipated, left things mostly unresolved.

And now ...

Batman Begins Week Continues with:

THE GREATEST BATMAN WRITERS OF ALL TIME:

Batman has been fortunate in terms of writers. Most mainstream superheroes are lucky to have one or two great stories that have been told throughout their histories being published. Batman has had dozens of amazing stories told, and his myth has been shaped by some of the absolute greatest writers to ever work in comics or any other medium. Here are some of the best, and the their definitive stories.

16.) Mike W. Barr - O'Barr is one of those classic yet underhyped writers whose ability has never gotten quite the recognition it deserves. But he has written a lot of good Batman stories, and a lot of his stuff is unusual in that it is no longer part of official cannon despite being quality stuff. For instance his Batman Year Two was taken out of continuity after it was retroactively explained that contrary to what happens in this story, Batman has never found out who killed his parents. O'Barr's Batman stories mix superheroics (Batman and the Outsiders) with dark tragedy and pathos (Year Two, Birth of the Demon), and the man deserves credit as a key contributer ot the modern mythos. (see: Batman: Year Two).

15.) Jim Starlin - Starlin has done a few key stories for Batman that really set the bar high. First you have to acknowldge his role in writing Batman: A Death in the Family, which saw the death of Robin II and, for all the hyper around it, was a damn good story that still holds up today. Also, Starlin wrote kind of the Batman fans' cult favorite story, Ten Nights of the Beast, a kickass story that pits Batman against the KG Beast, a villain who though kind of cheesy in concept, is depicted as an awesome threat in this action packed, classic story. (see: Batman: Ten Nights of the Beast, Batman: A Death in the Family)

14.) Grant Morrison - Already something of a modern legend, the Morrison's crazy ideas, unlimited imagination, and unique vision have established him as one of the greatest writers of the last two decades. His Batman works have been few, but Morrison really did a lot to redefine the character. First there's his graphic novel Arkham Asylum, a twisted look at Batman's rogues gallery which is a classically psychotic and nightmarish tale. Then there is Grant's work on JLA in the 90's, which helped establish the badass Batman of today, who seems to always be the JLA's MVP despite having no superpowers. Morrison's first JLA Arc, the awesome New World Order storyline, reintroduced a James Bond-like Batman who single handedly prevents a Martian invasion with his superior intellect. (see: Arkham Asylum, JLA: New World Order)

13.) Doug Moench - Moench is one of the most prolific Batman writers of the modern era, and helped write many of the key stories in Batman's career in the 80's and 90's, working with great artists like Jim Aparo. Moench has a flare for dark, moody stories, and wrote some great supernatural-themed stuff featuring magical characters like The Demon, giving Batman a large part of his otherworldly, gothic persona that came to define the character in Tim Burton's movies. Moench also wrote key chapters in epic event sagas like Knightfall, and did a number of standalone stories as well. Pick up any Batman collection from the 90's and you'll likely see Moench's sistinctive stamp. (see: Batman: Knightfall)

12.) Marv Wolfman - Wolfman's most lasting contribution to Batman actually took place in the pages of Teen Titans in the 80's, where his classic run with artist George Perez saw former teen sidekick Robin, aka Dick Grayson, evolve into Nightwing, stepping out of his mentor's shadow and going on to form his own identity. At the same time, he wrote the definitive version of Grayson's origins as Robin in Batman: Year Three. This transformation paved the way for numerous stories to come, including the introduction of the second Robin, Jason Todd, a character who Wolfman wrote and helped kill along with Jim Starlin. Wolfman would then go on to help introduce the third Robin, Tim Drake, in the story A Lonely Place of Dying, another key chapter in Batman's saga. While Wolfman is best known for Teen Titans and the epic Crisis on Infinite Earths, he is also a key shaper of the Batman mythology. (see: Batman: A Lonely Place of Dying, Teen Titans: The Judas Contract).

11.) Jeph Loeb - While Jeph's current work on titles like Superman / Batman is not among my favorite, this currently hot writer earns his place on the list for two amazing, character-defining stories that played a big role in influencing Batman Begins. Loeb's The Long Halloween and Dark Victory are great, classic, stories - dark, murder mysteries that show Batman's early years with unprecedented levels of emotion, character, and cinematic scope. Loeb's work with Tim Sale on the stories is canonical, but Loeb also went on to write perhaps the most hyped up Batman story ever, Hush, along with superstar artist Jim Lee. While the story was widely criticized for its lackluster ending, there's no question that it exemplified Loeb's ability to do widescreen, edge of your seat adventure like nobody else, along with an uncanny ability to write stories that really play to the strengths of his artists. (see: Batman: The Long Halloween)

10.) Ed Brubaker - Brubaker, along with Greg Rucka, are the two best Batman writers of the new millenium. Brubaker established himself during the epic No Man's Land story, and went on to produce some of the absolute best Batman stories ever in the following years, with a consistently satisfying run on the main Batman title that hit all the right notes, and showed a great mix of both character and action. Some of Brubaker's one-shot stories in the midst of the Batman: Bruce Wayne - Muderer / Fugitice story are shockingly good, and his work on the milestone Batman issue #600 is classic. (see: Batman - Bruce Wayne: Murderer? / Fugitive)

9.) Greg Rucka - I give Rucka the edge over Brubaker simply because he's worked on the character slightly longer and done more work overall. Rucka had a definitive run on Detective Comics over the last few years, and produced a long run of dark, noirish stories that harken back to Rucka's roots as a mystery / spy novelist, and intoduced love interest Sasha Bordeux, one of the best new Bat supporting characters in a long while. He also wrote some of the best chapters of No Man's Land, including the gripping final chapters. Rucka has also done awesome work with some of Batman's supporting characters. His miniseries Batman / Huntress: Cry For Blood was an amazing story of Gotham's most loose-cannon vigilante, The Huntress, that explored her mafioso roots. His work on the series Gotham Central, a ploice drama set in Batman's Gotham City, is award-winning and groundbreaking - all the best aspects of Hill Street Blues or NYPD Blue set in the world of Batman. (see: Batman / Huntress: Cry For Blood, Gotham Central: Half A Life, Batman: No Man's Land).

8.) Alan Moore - Moore is in my mind and the minds of many the best comics writer ever, bar none. His work on books like Watchmen is simply unmatched, not only in comics but in literature, period. And luckily, Moore has lent his talents to a select few Batman tales which, unsurprisingly, were classics. The notable contribution by Moore to the Batman mythos is of course The Killing Joke, an examination of The Joker that is, basically, the definitive story of Batman's greatest villain, featuring amazing art by Brian Bolland. The Killing Joke is one of the most intense, gripping, and darkest Batman stories ever told, and some would say one of the greatest comics stories ever, with a shocking ending that will stay with you forever afterwards, and reprecussions that forever changed the world of Batman. (see: Batman: A Killing Joke)

7.) Alan Grant - Along with Chuck Dixon and Doug Moench, Grant was one of the key Batman writers of the 1990's. But even in the midst of big event-driven storylines, Alan Grant always seemed to do his own thing, and his thing was damn good stuff. Grant had a knack for the pschological, and if you think about it Batman is all about the psychological element. It was Grant who spearheaded the launch of a new Batman title, Shadow of the Bat, to coincide with the new Batman movie in '89, and what a launch it was. From it's classic opening arc, The Last Arkham, in which Batman is imprisoned in Arkham Asylum alongside the criminals he helped to place there, Shadow of the Bat was the most innovative, mature, and well-written of the Bat titles at the time. Grant took chances and introduced new villains, like the serial killer Mr. Zsasz and the unpredictable Anarky. Grant went on to work on a number of Batman titles, specials, and miniseries throughout the 90's, and each maintained his clear ability to write Batman as a dark, shadowy, and psychologically complex character. Grant helped redefine the modern version of Batman, and sadly he has all but disappeared from the comics scene in recent years. But Alan Grant is truly one of the greats.

6.) Paul Dini - For over ten years, Paul Dini has been bringing superior Batman stories to television in the form of Batman: The Animated Series, a work that stands as the best ever translation of Batman from comics page to screen, and that is in large part to the decievingly simple scripting of Dini, who managed to combine the best elements of Batman into a timeless celebration of all that is great about the character. In comics, Dini is no slouch either, teaming with superstar artist Alex Ross on the oversized graphic novel Batman: War On Crime, and on occasional specials like the critically acclaimed Batman: Mad Love one-shot and Batman: Harley Quinn, which introduced his animated Harley Quinn character into the comics. But his work on The Animated Series is Dini's true and lasting contribution to the Batman legacy. (see: Batman: Mad Love)

5.) Steve Englehart - In the 60's, Batman was all fun and games, and had gotten away from being a grim avenger of the night as was originally intended. But two writers began to darken the character, one of whom was Steve Englehart, whose short but memorable run on Batman with artist Marshall Rogers in the 70's layed the groundwork for much of what was to come, and brought a darker, more mysterious atmosphere to the formerly camped-up world of Batman. Englehart reestablished Batman's villains, and wrote some of the all time classic Joker stories. He gave Batman one of his all time best and most memorable love interests, Silver St. Cloud. He introduced new villains like the marksman Deadshot. And most importantly, he combined the fun and adventure of the 1960's Batman with the maturity and depth of modern storytelling to completely change the way that the character was perceived from that point on. (see: Batman: Strange Apparitions)

4.) Chuck Dixon - While he is never listed among the great comics writers like Alan Moore and Grant Morrison, few writers are able to capture and define the voice of comic book characters like Chuck Dixon. Dixon is a writer who has perhaps contributed more elements to the modern Batman canon than any other, and in doing so he forever set the tone, created the voice, of Batman, Robin, Commisioner Gordon, Alfred Pennyworth, Nightwing, Barbara Gordon,and a host of other characters. At the same time, Dixon has a flair for pure action-based storytelling like few others do, and has created a number of action-adventure epics featuring Batman and his supporting cast. Dixon is the definitive writer of Robin, Nightwing, and Birds of Prey, three books on which he had long runs that forever shaped the featured characters, to the point where other writer's versions seem off in comparision, for lack of having that trademark Chuck Dixon inner monologue, which got you inside the heads of his protagonists so that you really felt like you knew characters like Robin, aka Tim Drake, like they were your high school buddy. Along with his sometime writing partner Scott Beatty, Dixon really has been the modern gatekeeper of Batman's universe, and he wrote some great stories while he was at it. (see: Batman: Knights' End, Robin: A Hero Reborn, Nightwing: The Hunt for Oracle)

3.) Bob Kane / Bill Finger - These two created Batman, and while their early stories were simplistic and rough by today's standards, they created an icon who is one of pop culture's greatest characters. Kane saw the appeal of a man who was born of tragedy, who was not super per se but just a regular guy who wanted nothing more than to stop criminals. The two's imagination and vision led to an amazing series of ideas, from wonderous gadgets to memorable villains to the first ever teenaged sidekick in Robin, The Boy Wonder. Give credit where credit is due - these guys started it all, and in doing so changed pop culture forever.

2.) Frank Miller - The Batman as we know him today? Yep, that's in large part Frank Miller's doing. Miller changed comics forever with Dark Knight Returns in the late 1980's. One of the greatest comics ever published, Dark Knight, along with Alan Moore's Watchmen, deconstucted the superhero for the modern day and looked past the masks to give a new spin on what it meant to be a hero in a world that seemed increasingly drawn in shades of grey. Dark Knight changed everything. It was Batman for adults. It was practically rite of passage reading. It was R-rated, or at least close to it, and it was unrelentingly dark, violent, and gritty. And most of all, it was a simply amazing story, the likes of which had never been seen before in mainstream comics. If you've never read Dark Knight Returns, read it now! I guarantee you'll be blown away by what you find. Sonn after, Miller would apply his same grim n' gritty style to Batman: Year One, an in-continuity tale that rebooted Batman from scratch and retold his origin for modern audiences. Year One is almost as much of a classic as Dark Knight, and is probably the number one influence on Batman Begins' look and feel. Miller reinvented Batman in the 1980's, and everything since is just riding his coattails. (see: Batman: The Dark Knight Returns, Batman: Year One)

1.) Denny O'Neal - O'Neal is my pick for the all time greatest Batman writer, and the reason is that for over thirty years, O'Neal has been contributing to the Batman legend and defining the character like no other singular personality has ever done. Denny O'Neal along with artist Neal Adams singlehandedly saved Batman in the 70's. Batman had become a joke, a campy punchline as delivered by Adam West. But O'Neal, with his darkly poetic prose and atmospheric narration dripping with moonlit night skies, exotic locales, and ominous creatures kicked Batman in the ass and never let up. O'Neal brought back the grim crusader, the enigmatic Dark Knight. He pitted Batman against new foes like Ra's Al Ghul (star of Batman Begins), and made the adventures mature, realistic, and yet absolutely fantastical - pure, exhilirating escapism in the grandest pulp-noir tradition. And yet, O'Neal didn't stop there. He kept writing Batman into the 80's, and shaping him as an editor during the next few decades as well. And he kept going. In the 90's O'Neal came back in a big way, launching the new title Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight and writing many of its best stories himself, including new classics like Batman: Venom. He added new layers to the Batman supporting cast with the groundbreaking Batman: Sword of Azrael series, which would introduce Bruce Wayne's short lived replacement as Azrael, and then O'Neal would go on to write a succesful spinoff Azrael series for 100 issues, despite being a senior editor and well past middle age. He was instrumental in crafting the big event stories of the 90's and beyond, from Knightfall to No Man's Land, and he still hasn't stopped. O'Neal opened the door for people like Frank Miller to take Batman to new places, and in general he opened the doors to new levels of sophistication, relevance, and realism in comics - but of all his many contributions to the field, O'Neal's stands out as Batman's greatest writer. (see: Batman: Tales of the Demon)

Alright - can you feel the hype building?

Tommorow it's another early day, so I'm off. Whoooooooooooo.