I've Got a Fever, and the Only Cure is MORE COWBELL!!!

Too much cowbell still ain't enough, know what I mean?

As Jim Anchower might say, it's been a long time since I rapped at ya'.

Definitely felt some blog writing fatigue after my insane entries last week. Damn those were some long entries, ya feel me?

Okay, so it's summer time and yet there are no seasons here in the semi-Real World. Speaking of the Real World, I saw the first ep of the new Austin season last night, because as much as a given season may suck, those first introductory episodes are almost always reality TV gold. And as much as I may diss Real World lately, you've gotta love it's now classic formula. No gimmicks, no contests, just straight up reality TV, which as we all know by now is not quite real, especially in this age of self-awareness where reality TV "stars" are already well aware of the cliches and expectations associated with them. So instead of presenting a cross section of interesting young adults as they once did, MTV now presents a predictable mix of "diverse" cast members, who are all slight variations on a common theme: ridiculously attractive young people, with little to offer in the way of personality or intelligence, who came to the house to party, hook up, and have their inevitable 15 minutes of fame. Despite all that, it was a pretty entertaining hour of TV, and it was hilarious to see that one guy, Wes I think his name was, just go nuts with giddiness at everything that was happening. Now that I am starting to write about it, it's kind of ridiculous to analyze. But hey, there was drama, a fight, an arrest ... what more do you want? Long live The Real World, dammit all.

Oh and while I'm talking TV, just a quick note that this past Sunday's Family Guy was easily the funniest of the new season so far. Sure, the premise of Peter being borderline retarded was a bit too familiar (probably ripped from The Simpsons as are so many of the plots and jokes), but this was the first one of the new batch that had me laughing from start to finish - all the jokes worked. So that should silence the dissenters for a while.

Oh yeah, I took major advantage of Best Buy's recent limited time half-off sale on X-Files DVD sets, purchasing the first three seasons of the show over the last two months. Damn, the early seasons of this show are even more amazing now than they were then, as they blow away most of what you currently see on TV. I am especially enjoying rewatching some of the real early, first season stuff, before the mythology became convoluted and there was this huge sense of mystery surrounding everything.

So anyways, what's been up at work ...?

TONIGHT SHOW STUFF:

Saw a few tapings this week and last ... nothing too great to report. This week has really seen the show hit rock bottom - I mean this week we had a lineup of Martin Lawrence, Sinbad, Dr. Phil, and Don Rickles as consecutive headliners. Okay, I used to love Martin back in the day, but this isn't 1994. Sinbad, wow that is just embarrasing, even if he was classic in Necessary Roughness. Dr. Phil's on like every other week, and Don Rickles is a legend, sure, but where's the stars of Batman, Bewitched, or any of the other big summer movies? And the musical lineups have been equally bad, with the lowlight being a absolutely cringe-worthy performance by Sugar Ray the other day, who believe it or not has a GREATEST HITS album coming out. WHAAAAAT?!?! They had like one hit song, not to mention they completely suck as a band, which was proven by their bad live performance. I mean, come on, at least do that one kinda catchy song they had, you know "all around the world statues crumble for me" or whatever. At least that was a decent pop song. The one they did about summertime or something was just painful. In addition, I hate to say this but Jay's monologues have been at a real lowpoint lately. I guess the lack of Michael Jackson in the news mean, GASP, Jay and his staff must actually strive to be creative in their joke-writing. Today I was CB and got to admit Dr. Phil as well as uber-critics Ebert and Roeper. I told Ebert I had read his recent book and was a big fan, so that was kind of cool, though I was kind of struck that Ebert didn't look so hot, hope everthing's alright with him. While I feel like the thumbs go up a little too easily these days, I feel like Ebert really is a great reviewer and is always honest and well-spoken in his reviews, especially his written reviews for the Chicago-Sun Times. Him and Siskel back in the day always seemed to give attention to less hyped up films and really seemed to have a passion and appreciation for the good stuff, which I think all true fans can really respect.

Now that that rant is done, business has been picking up around the page office as seven, count 'em, seven new pages joined our ranks this week. Of course I've barely had time to meet them since my schedule has had me running around doing tours and whatnot like nobody's business. Unfortunately, things are not working out on the assignment front. I didn't get the most recent Studios Production assignment I applied for, which was pretty disappointing as I really thought I might be a lock for that one. Now I'm applying for this one producer's second assistant assignment, which would be GREAT if I could get it. I'd be able to check out scripts, meet writers, visit sets, etc. which would be awesome. Unfortunately, if I don't get this one ... well, let's just say I'll have to do some serious reevaluating, because after this there really isn't anything coming down the pipeline in the near future.

Man, talking to returning Camp Shalom counsellor Jeremy Yanofsky over IM, it is amazing how much my Counslerrin' years prepared me for my current job. I mean, leading groups of people around a small area and trying to make it all seem fun and interesting while trying to impart just a little piece of my wisdom to them? Check. Dealing with an eclectic group of coworkers? Check. Striving to find some outlet for my creative energies amidst the beurocracy and red tape? Check (and I have the classic Cosmic Doodad movie trilogy to prove it). The only thing the page program is missing is dodgeball and bug juice.

RANDOM STUFF:

Saw a free screening of The Longest Yard at NBC today. Not bad at all, though I'm glad it was free. Actually it did have some funny moments, and the whole movie was pretty consistently entertaining the whole way through. It was actually pretty dark in some ways, despite what I'd heard that it was purely a goofball comedy, and basically it worked well for what it was. Sandler was actually pretty decent here, more restrained than usual with a bit of a harder edge. Rock was okay even if he was basically playing himself. Funny to see so many pro wrestlers in the movie, kind of surreal to see former interfederation rivals Stone Cold Steve Austin and Bill Goldberg together, and Kevin "Diesel" Nash was actually really funny in his part. Burt Reynolds pretty much ruled it in the kickass old man with one more game left in him role. Overall though the comedy was a bit lacking with a lot of the lines and gags falling flat, even though the dramatic arc of the movie was, surprisingly, it's biggest strength. My grade: B

- I'm not sure what JD Powers and Associates is, but damn if they don't have a kickass sounding name.

- Who in the blue hell is watching this Dancing With the Stars crap? And yet ... NBC is probably kicking themselves for not thinking of this "brilliant" idea. Oyyyyy ......

- I spend way too much on groceries. I don't know why it seems like so much. I think other people literally do not eat. Like they have a glass of juice for dinner or something. Dammit people, you need your vitamins.

- Grape-flavored Fruit 2 O, while hard to find, is clearly a superior flavor.

- While I don't claim to be a Dr. Phil fan, the man makes sense, and I respect that.

And ......... that's all folks. For now ...