Adamantium-Infused: WOLVERINE Review and MORE!

And then it was the summer movie season ...

While this summer boasts no sure-thing fanboy juggernaut on par with last summer's Iron Man or Dark Knight, there are still the usual bigtime tentpoles that will be vying for your hard-earned dollars. Personally, I can't help but feel that there are some big, big question marks around many of the summer's biggest movies. We already saw the first misfire of the summer with Wolverine -- sure, the movie made bank, but creatively, well, it didn't exactly raise the bar. Star Trek *was* a big unknown, but the onslaught of glowing reviews has pretty much convinced me that it won't disappoint. That said, a movie like Terminator: Salvation could still go either way -- I mean, who isn't salivating at the thought of finally seeing an adult John Connor fighting evil robot armies in the future? But -- McG as a bigtime action director is still a pretty unproven commodity. I remain somewhat optimistic, but still, you never know. Really, the only 100% sure-thing this summer is UP. Pixar can basically do no wrong, and as much as I loved Wall-E, I get the sense that UP might be even better. I love the fact that we know so little about the movie, too. Pixar has earned the right to play coy - I can't wait to see what they have up their sleeve.

On the other hand, I think we've had a very above-average winter and spring at the movies. There were some truly great comedies like Observe and Report, Adventureland, and Fanboys, and some badass action flicks like Taken and, of course, Watchmen. There was even Anvil: The Story of Anvil, which may well end up as the documentary of the year. Usually, it's rare for movies from January to April to end up on my Year-End Best-Of list, but I could definitely see it happening in a couple of cases in '09.

Anyways, let's talk Wolverine ...


X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE Review:

- Okay, first off, let me reitirate my position on the X-Men movies. I thought Part 1 was okay - it got a lot of the fundamentals right, but never really captured the colorful and over-the-top nature of the comics or cartoons. I never really loved the "realistic" approach that Bryan Singer took, and it was clear that Singer never really got the more comic-bookish elements of the franchise. Halle Berry as Storm was a joke, and some of the other casting was equally bland. The real stroke of genius was the twin casting of Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellan - the sheer awesomeness of those two helped to elevate the franchise far beyond what it might have been otherwise. Don't get me wrong - Singer had a great eye for updating some of the classic characters and for the interpersonal drama that was part and parcel with the X-Men. But he never really seemed to be having fun with it - all the little things that made the X-Men cool - from the flashy costumes to Wolverine's berzerker rage, seemed cleaned up and toned down. X2 was a big improvement. It kept the great character moments from Part 1 and upped the ante in terms of scope and action. X2 still stands as one of the better superhero movies ever made. Now, X3 gets a ton of crap from fans, but to me it wasn't much different from the previous two movies. In fact, I actually enjoyed the film's focus on action and superheroics. Sure, it was a letdown for those hoping for a faithful adaptation of The Dark Phoenix Saga, but come on, who ever thought that that would happen? So to me, X3 remains one of the most perpetually underrated movies by comic geeks. Not because I think it's the end all be all, but just because I think it's about on-par with the previous two movies, and is in some ways even more entertaining. I guess I preface with this because to me, the argument of which is better: X3 or Wolverine? - is easy to answer - X3 all the way. X3 had several moments that were undeniably cool - Kitty Pryde outrunning the Juggernaut, Logan confronting the Phoenix power even as it tore him to shreds ... Wolverine ... was seriously short on moments of awesomeness.

Focusing back in on WOLVERINE ... To me, I've never been fully happy with Hugh Jackman in the role. I like Jackman as an actor, and he's been excellent in a number of movies. I just think it's too bad that Wolverine had to be played by such a leading-man type actor. I would have liked to see Wolverine as a true badass - a Clint Eastwood or Jack Nicholson type. Someone who's gritty, dirty, ugly - someone who you don't want to mess with. Hugh Jackman is a charismatic and talented actor, but he doesn't really fit that mold.

Still, whatever ... if Wolverine as a movie rocked, I could easily get over any reservations I might have about Jackman. But the fact is, Wolverine is just sort of there. It feels thrown together, with a plot that barely makes sense and a lot of scenes that seem to have been included for a supposed cool-factor and little else. Not only that, but the movie has an inherently uphill battle in that it insists on focusing on Wolverine's origin ... when the whole point of the character is that he is a mysterious lone wolf. Sure, the comics eventually caved and gave Logan a fleshed-out origin, and some of that is adapted in the movie ... but really, it is not a story that needed to be told. Especially given that, here, we get all kinds of self-reflective Wolverine. This isn't Batman, dude. Wolverine isn't a character with a lot of inner turmoil, he's an animalistic ass-kicking machine. But, again, the comics at least gave us a damn good story when Marvel chose to do the origin -- the movie gives us random scenes set in the past that mostly amount to jack squat. We see a young James Howlett (aka Logan) accidentally kill his own father. We see Logan and Victor Creed, his half brother (aka Sabretooth) randomly fight together in every major American war (guess he's not Canadian anymore?), just because, hey, why not?

Later, the movie flashes to Wolverine's time as some kind of special ops recruit for the government-sponsored Team X, a pre-X-Men team of mutants that do all kinds of morally-gray black ops type stuff. On this team is Logan, Victor, Wade Wilson (Deadpool), and a couple of other lesser-known guys with names like Agent Zero. Ryan Reynolds as Wilson is an instant standout - at first, his wise-cracking demeanor and kickass sword-wielding skills seem right out of the comics. It only makes sense then that the character in this form has about 10 minutes of screentime, before becoming a hideous mutant uber-villain who can't speak and inexplicably has the power of EVERY OTHER mutant in the movie, plus ... he can grow giant swords from his hands. Say what now? Hmm, so apparently this movie was written by your third-grade cousin.

In fact, the selection of characters in this movie seems completely random. I mean, hey, you know who'd be call in a Wolverine Origin movie? GAMBIT! Why is Gambit in this movie? What narrative purpose does he serve? I have no idea. He has approximately ONE SCENE of vintage Rajun' Cajun' card-throwin' coolness, but is otherwise pretty much a waste. Yes, I geeked out like everyone else when Gambit hurled some kinetic energy-infused playing cards. But yeah, his character is emblematic of what's wrong with this movie - there's no rhyme or reason behind everything - it's just "let's throw a bunch of randomness at the movie screen and see what sticks." A cameo by Patrick Stewart as Professor X, for example, could have been cool but is ultimately a throwaway. The inclusion of younger versions of iconic X-Men like Cyclops feels like overkill. The Blob? Meh.

And would it have killed them to have Gambit sport his trademark tan trenchcoat? Couldn't have Deadpool donned his awesome red and black mask from the comics? Why use these characters if you take all the fun out of them?

I will give some props though - Jackman does put in a good effort with what he's given to work with. The other real standout though is Liev Schreiber as Sabretooth. Now, keep in mind, Victor Creed here is nothing like his comic book counterpart, and nothing like Tyler Mane's version in the first X-Men movie. So that in and of itself is a bit disappointing. But ... Schreiber gives it a good go, and is clearly having a lot of fun in the role. If nothing else, he's one badass Jew.

But really, Wolverine is kind of a mess. Even the f/x tend to look somewhat haphazardly done at times, with a couple of climactic fight scenes looking very green screen-ish. Visually, the movie has no real consistent look or style - again, just kind of bland. What's more, the tone never really feels right. There are a couple of moments that feel appropriately epic and dark (ie when the adamantium is injected into Wolvie's body - pretty cool), but the movie never really gets as gritty or brutal or intense as it should. By the film's climax, you barely care what's going on or why. We all know that Wolverine is destined to lose his memories of this adventure, for example, and the moment where his mind is wiped should have been dramatic and memorable. Instead, it happens through a very goofy and contrived means (an adamantium bullet to the brain), and the impact of it all never truly hits home. If anything, the movie ends up in a strange place, in which the preceding story is rendered almost inconsequential since it seems to have little effect on what we know will come next. It's one more example of the storytelling here being sort of weak overall. I mean, even the post-credits teaser ain't exactly all that. Iron Man and Hulk had badass bonus scenes, but all we get here is either a.) Deadpool: not dead! or b.) Wolverine - at a bar in Japan! Oooh, Japan, setting of the classic Frank Miller comic book tale. Could be good setup for a sequel, right? Problem is, after this movie, you won't exactly be jonesing for a Part 2 ... the fact is, this movie seems to indicate that there isn't much gas left in the X-Men tank. If anything, I got the urge to pop in the recently-released DVD's of the awesome 90's-era cartoon series and remind myself of the days when Wolverine really did kick some ass, Bub.

My Grade: C+


- Alright, GO CELTICS and psyched for LOST. Snikt!